Through the emotional roller coaster that is pregnancy, childbirth and sleepless midnight feedings, I rediscovered one very important thing about my relationships - maybe this wasn't so important before, or maybe it is just insanely important now...
Friends listen to you.
It seems like millions of people wanted to come to the hospital to visit and see the new baby. And they did. Without asking first. Ok, I know that this is common and considered normal, but I didn't want it. I wanted my family and Fiance's family, but that's it. I asked a few other people to come to the hospital, and some of them did show up which was lovely, but some of them also politely declined because they knew I would need the time to recover and bond with my precious little love. Everyone else who showed up just annoyed me, and then they wouldn't leave! Grrrrr! I don't feel like I had a chance to bond with her until after we went home because all I did was try to hold my pee (and keep my gown closed) until there was a break in unannounced visitors. Anyway, you friends who respected my wishes to have family only visit, thank you.
So at home people wanted to come over too, which is fine, but again many of these people didn't respect my specific requests (which were usually to visit for only an hour, and to bring me food instead of cute tiny little clothes for the baby.) One friend comes to mind when I remember those blurry days with a newborn. I'll call her "Angel." Angel brought me food. Angel waited on me in my own home. Angel called to see how I was doing before asking about the baby or Fiance. Angel listened to me vent, gave me hugs, and told me funny, non-baby stories to make me laugh and keep my mind off the millions of hormone-induced worries I had. Angel called a few times a week to see if I needed anything, to tell me she's in the area if I wanted company, and most importantly, she called to tell me that she was just thinking of me and she loved me. I love Angel, and sometimes I wish I had a million more of her in my life. But I have just one, and she's perfect.
I thought that this post was going to be a bitch about the many selfish friends I have who came over unannounced and piled their gifts of baby clothes in the corner of my living room while I was hungry and dying to take a hot shower... But I really am more grateful for those few unselfish friends than angry with the rest. I guess I have to be angry to write an angry blog post? There are a few people on this Earth who are undoubtedly deserving of my complete respect, and they know who they are. I just hope they also know that I am eternally grateful for their presence in my life.
What is supposed to be the most joyous of occasions (don't get me wrong, it has been an amazingly beautiful time since my daughter was born) is so easily turned into a nightmare, an upheaval of emotions and stability... Thank you, dear unselfish friends, for helping to carry me through.
No comments:
Post a Comment